When all of us are getting ready for a move, we tend to focus on ourselves—which is necessary to get all the things done we need to during a move. However, on this Thanksgiving Day I want to take a few moments and focus on those around us and how we can make sure we don’t forget them when we are in the chaos of our move.
Friends – While we may not be able to spend a ton of time with our friends when we have so much on our plates, we need to make sure we are there when our friends need us even if it is inconvenient. These are the people that have been there for us and will most likely be involved in the tasks of our move, how can we not be there for them? Close friends will understand when you can’t do everything just like before, but, they will still want you to touch base and let them know you are thinking about them. Moving not only can cause us anxiety, but, depending on where we are moving in relation to our friends, it might cause them some too—and they might not tell you that because they just want to show you support. Like I said in a previous blog, showing them, you are thinking of them doesn’t take too much effort and can give you a needed break from work to just enjoy their company for a bit. If you are moving a distance away, those cherished moments will mean a lot when you can’t get together as often as you did before.
Family – Extended family will be a lot like friends during a move. Sometimes they will watch your kids while you are packing or help you sort through stuff you need to get rid of. Treating them with the same regards as your friends is important. Make time for them. When it comes to your immediate family (the ones that are moving with you!) remember they feel the stress and anxiety you may be feeling as well as the excitement. Some may be on the same page with you emotionally about the move, while others may be in a totally different place. This may cause tension when and where you don’t expect it, so be prepared as best as you can and try to be sensitive to other people’s needs and feelings too. When we moved with all the kids, no one was usually on the same page at the same time and there would be ‘dissention in the ranks’ of all! Keeping the doors of communication open is a good way for everyone to try to understand each other. Also, they will need time to be with their friends during this time too, so be sensitive to that when they have a lot of work to do. So many moves we usually had extra people around in the weeks prior—and sometimes it was just a lot to deal with, but, it was always worth it. The time flies by so fast and before you know it you are moved and settled.
Community – First there is the community you are leaving and then the new one you will be joining. You don’t just change a community like you change a light bulb. When you change a light bulb, you put in another bulb that is the same and the same light shines just like it did before. When you are a “light bulb” in a community, you don’t just plop yourself in another community and shine the same—it takes a bit of time to ‘warm up’ --like LED bulbs! In your old community, depending on how long you were there, you got to know how your neighbors’ personalities (or lifestyles) were in general and you knew where you did (and didn’t) fit in. In a new community, that will all take time to find out. Don’t judge too harshly the new people you are around because they all don’t know how amazing you are—yet—and you don’t assume how they all are either, until you get to know them. Try getting involved in some projects in your new community through you children’s school, through your church—or even through some other avenue in your new ‘hood. This will help you get closer to those around you and maybe make the warming up process a little bit easier!
During this holiday season, whether you are moving or not, let us ALL be patient with each other. Take the time to say, “thank you” to those who have been there in the good, the bad and the everyday moments of our lives. Strive to create those ‘moments’ you can cherish forever—no matter where you may live! Until next week!